DRIVING IN LA - PA-LEASE!

LA is a car culture... and while it would be oh, so NICE to have a better public transportation system here, we are all used to driving and we love the independence of time that it provides us.

At the same time... I wish we could all drive by the same rules. Here are some things that tend to bother me when I cam commuting cross-town in the mornings and evenings that I'd like to vent... er... share with you.

To my fellow LA drivers:

1) When you are in an intersection waiting for on-coming traffic to clear before making a right or left turn, edge out FAR enough so that a car or two behind you can also make the turn - especially before the light turns red! If I had an egg to toss for everyone who DID NOT impart this courtesy, you'd see nothing but scrambled Toyotas.

2) If you are on a major boulevard that is at least 3-4 lanes wide - DO NOT GO UNDER the speed limit and mosey along in the LEFT LANE! While we all must (ahem) go the speed limit, the right lane is the "slow" lane. I passed THREE (yes, THREE) slow-going cars by using the middle lane this morning and in my rear-view mirror saw a long line of frustrated drivers behind these slow-pokes.

3) DO NOT STOP to buy a glass of fresh squeezed orange juice, fresh cherries, flowers or peanuts from a vendor where there is a fast changing stop light. You'll never make it quick enough and you'll only piss off the line of cars BEHIND you. (the cherries are fabulous, though)

4) And if you see Jay Leno driving some Stanely Steamer or any other such novelty car... do not slow down to stare and wave him on... friggin' Google his car collection when you get to the office and MOVE ON!

Always... wear your seat belts, use your bluetooth hands-free sets (that's a $92 fine if you don't) and stop at all 3-way stop signs ('cause there's a B&W waiting in the wings to clip you for the California roll)